Thinking about spending the day worrying about whether or not I have lipstick on my teeth, or whether or not my lipstick has ‘bled’ (even that phrase sets my teeth on edge) is just not my cup of tea. A smudged eye looks trashy in a cool way – a smudged lip makes me think of those ladies who can’t get a taxi to take them home because they’re far too trolleyed.

Oh dear. Perhaps I haven’t given lip colour a fair trial in the past – but all that is about to change! I am bravely foraying into the world of ‘look at me’ lips…or perhaps bravely is not quite the word; the colour in question is Nars Roman Holiday in the form of the Velvet Matte Lip Pencil. It was used on a shoot (see picture above) and it could almost have been made for me! A matte, chalky finish rather than high-gloss shine (big tick!), a colour that looks scarily bright unapplied (see squiggle) but that is part-neutral, part-healthy glow when applied (massive tick!) It will never bleed, (ugh!) it will never stain my teeth, it won’t leave marks on my glass when I am trying to drink champagne and pretend to be chic, and if I accidentally drop it on the new bedroom carpet and squish it, I won’t have to spend an afternoon spraying Vanish at it and scrub-blotting with an old pair of underpants.

There. What’s not to love?! It’s one of the most flattering shades that I have seen for ages, and would work with most skin tones – let the eyes do the talking with black mascara and a bit of seventies liner.

The ultimate non-scary, non-attention-catching lip-colour for fellow lip-o-phobes. £17, Nars.